caerula's Diaryland Diary

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More from court

I tried to do this as a narrative, but I just can't right now. It is much too emotionally exhausting to put in any kind of coherent narrative. And so instead, I present items from a custody hearing:

Dementors were told repeatedly by teachers and a counselor that YB seemed distractable, that he was far behind what his intelligence level indicated he should be in learning to read, that he needed constant reminders to pay attention and focus, that he showed poor impulse control and could be a bully with his friends, that he was quick to anger and quick to calm down, that he repeatedly lost privileges and had to have his desk moved next to the teacher. Yet, since no one apparently acually said "ADHD" to them, it never occured to them that ADHD could be a possibility. So that when it was brought up at conferences this semester by Mrs. B, they were "shocked" and had no explanation other than that this was caused by how upset YB is at living with his father.

This is a child who supposedly had major health problems the first 5 years of his life. Yet when the physician's assistant who had been YB's "primary medical provider since birth" changed practices, the Dementors changed YB's primary care doctor so they could stay with the same P.A. Number one, why would a child with "major health problems" be seen primarily by a P.A.? And they think BB takes YB's health problems lightly. Whatever.

Early this spring, YB thought he saw a gun at my parents' house and caused a huge ruckus by telling the Dementors before he told us. (He didn't. It's a long story.)
Blues' lawyer: "If this issue concernced you so much, why did you wait almost two weeks before mentioning it to BigBlue?"
Dementor#1: "I prefer to speak to that individual with a 3rd party present."
Laywer: "That individual? Are you referring to your grandson's father?"
And this soon after D#1 was claiming to respect BB as YB's father and understand why he wants to spend more time with his son. And yet the language and tone of voice demonstrated such a palpable lack of respect for BB. At least when we were testifying, we managed to keep our utter contempt for these people off the court record.

D#3 doesn't have her own lawyer, so she gets to get up and read a prepared statement in lieu of testifying on her own behalf. D#1&2's lawyer was so moved by this statement that she was crying by the end of it. It was moving all right. Nearly moved me to be sick. She can't even get the color of YB's eyes right, or how many years it's been since she and BB were involved. And I've received emails from this woman. I know her level of literacy. She did not write the statement she read in court. Several of the emails she sent YB are now in the record, so we can only hope the judge at least realized the level of duplicity here.

There's more. There's so much more, but I can't even think of it right now.

12:10 p.m. - 2001-06-25

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